You’re funny, you should be a comedian.

Standard

Customer: How much for Les Mis tonight?
Me: We’re super busy today, I’ve just got tickets left at £80 each.
C: For both?
Me: No, £80 each.
C: How much?
Me: £80. Eight-zero.
C: Sheesh. Wow. OK.

*Turns to friend for a discussion. Lots of sighing, eye rolling and, “should we just do it?”*

C: So how much was it?
Me: £80 each. £160 if you want two.
C: Right, we’ll do it.

*Hands me a £20 note*

Me: You’re £140 short.
C: What? No, that’s too much?
Me: What do you think I said?
C: £18.
Me: 1) if you think you’re seeing Les Mis on a Saturday night for £9 each, you might as well go eat a bucket of dicks. 2) If you thought it was only going to cost you £18, what the hell was all the eye rolling and sighing for, ya stingy minge?!

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