The sign says “half price and discounted tickets available here”…


A man enters the shop. Even before he speaks, the arrogance is rolling off him in waves. He addresses me like a kid he’s just found doing something naughty.

Me: Hi, can I —
Customer: Your sign says “half price”, so I’ll be expecting you to only quote me prices that really are half price, yes?
Me: Hmm you should probably lower your expectations. The majority of the shows will just be discounted rather than half price.
C: *Bark of incredulous laughter* Then WHY have you made a sign advertising half price tickets and brandished it all over the place?
Me: Well first of all, I didn’t make the sign. And second of all, a couple of the shows ARE half price, but most of them will just be discounted.
C: Alright darling, calm down. I’m just having a bit of fun with you.
Me: Yeah, your attempts at belittling me have been super fun. Next.


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