Guessing she won’t be the weirdest person I interact with today.


Customer in my shop talking on the phone. She hangs up and says to me, unflinchingly, “some people deserve a bullet to the head.” I smiled weakly and was just like, “haha yeah…” We then went on to discuss ticket prices for Jersey Boys for the next 20 mins, throughout which time she let me know that she gets her head shaved every month at a barbers by her house, it costs £7 but it’s worth it to not have to stress; she always keeps cable ties in her bag, “just in case” (I’m guessing that’s just in case she needs to kidnap someone); she illegally scattered her Mother’s ashes in a cemetery at London Bridge because she couldn’t be bothered with the paper work (she emphasised that I wasn’t to repeat that information but apparently I can’t be trusted); and last but not least, she asked me to take a look inside her mouth to see if I thought she had tonsillitis… I can still feel the residue of her warm breath on my face now.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s