Incontinence: The Silent Assassin.


A mum and her two early twenties daughters buying tickets for Dirty Dancing, sound like they’re from Stoke.

Mum: Can you get us in’t seats that’s near’t toilet? Cos Amy’s always needing toilet.
Amy: Oh my god, shurrup mum!
Emma: For god’s sake, mum!
Mum: What, it’s true in’t it? I’m just saying, I don’t want her to be stuck in’t middle of row in case she starts dropping you-know-what on’t seat.
Emma: Mum, you’re so out of order!
Amy: And it’s not true anyway, so just shurrup, will ya?
Me: … OK. Well I can put you on an aisle seat if you prefer?
Mum: Yeah, for’t best I think.
Emma: I’m just gutted Patrick Swayze ain’t gonna be there.
Mum: Oh don’t say that, you’ll get me started on the waterworks again.
Amy: Yeah, I don’t wanna think about Patrick, we’ll be blubbing again in’t minute.
Emma: I know but it’s just so heartbreaking.
Me: Right, and did you want to pay by cash or by card?


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